My poor body still doesn’t know whether it is sick with a particular type of sick like a virus or infection, or just the normal fibro sick, or having difficulty with new meds sick.
I can’t tolerate the pain without either 1. Taking a lot of masking medication that makes me act loopy, or 2. Sitting and resting.
Activity makes me crash, the urge to go to sleep coming over me like an unstoppable wave as soon as I sit down. Many afternoons in the last week have involved me sleeping after work, waking up with extremely poor concentration and not being able to do the administrative work at home that I need to do in order to keep up deadlines at work. The worst thing about this is that other teachers are relying on me doing my tasks in a timely manner so that their lives run easier as well.
Today I decided to stay home from work. This is a difficult decision for me every time I have to make it. Fortunately I have not had to do this many days this year. Last week on the Tuesday I was so vague and unwell for most of the day, trying to ignore my pain and rickety body while also trying to engage my students in quality learning. Today I thought I would go see my GP and see what he thinks about my current level of symptoms.
My GP was impressed that we have a new diagnosis from the rheumatologist, although neither a record of that nor my results from the MRIs have arrived at my GPs office yet. He is worried that I am coming down with something as well and with my immune system at 0 he said I need to stay home and rest for a few days. He also told me to cut back on the anti inflammatories (whoops).
I am always happy for rest days, especially when their timing is most helpful. However missing work means I miss a lot of the life of the school. The goings on at work keep me inspired and motivated in daily life. We are starting to plan out next year. That is exciting and challenging. We are finalising reports. That is arduous, but engaging. I have a lot of difficulty explaining why I am having the time off, even though it is Dr directed and I need it. I work unwell way too many times, many people don’t really get that and I don’t communicate my needs very well.
Knowing I have the next couple of days off takes the pressure off me for a short while and I am sure that will help. I just have to resist the urge to try to do things in that time that are not restful. Except tonight, tonight I have some work things that have to be finished by tomorrow morning. It might be a long night.